New member with a question

[Lehighvalley1981]

Hi I am a new member here, I have been reading around and you guys seem like a nice open community. I am a 24 y/o male living in Pennsylvania.

I needed some like minded people to let me know if what Im thinking is true or am i just lieing to myself. I am very much attacted to transsexuals. I like everything about them, the way they try so much harder to be women and that makes them look alot more done up like a women then most women.

See the thing is I always thought that my love for transgender women was a sign that I was gay. Which I have explored a little bit and came to the conclusion that I am not at all attacted to men, but I do like the fact that the Ttransgender women have a penis.

So I dont know what to think, I dont at all like men, but I like transgender women. I am very confused. I have had an experience with one TS women in TX, we just went on a few dates and ended up kissing and some heavy petting, but after that we kind of lost touch.

Also I am finding it hard to deal with becasue finding a TS Girlfreind is not that easy to find.

Thanx for any imput and glad to be part of the bored

[edooo]

Hey dude.
I used to think about the same as you some time ago, untill someone asked me these questions..

Do you like hairy men?
Do you watch gay porn?.
Are you in any way attracted to a man??

Well if your answer is "no" to all those 3 questions, then your not gay! :D

[Ecstatic]

Maybe we should just sit back and watch the newbies talk their way through this.... :lol:

This is the oldest and most recurrent question guys ask. Edoo is right. You're not gay, though you're not shall we say entirely straight.

But what difference does a label make? Much better to discover who you are and what you like, and be happy with that.

[edooo]

"Maybe we should just sit back and watch the newbies talk their way through this.... "

Why are we "newbies".....what make us newbies and you "pro" ?

[Lehighvalley1981]

I answered no to all, Im not looking for a title, just wanted an opinion. I know what I like but was confused, Being intrested in TG women is not the norm, so when you find out you like them your not sure what it is and just figure your gay

I know for me this was not true, I did not like men, but I can except the fact that im not 100% stright, its cool with me

[Ecstatic]

"Maybe we should just sit back and watch the newbies talk their way through this.... "

Why are we "newbies".....what make us newbies and you "pro" ?

Newbie = fewer than a couple of dozen posts. :roll: On a forum like this, it's generally noobs who have just started posting who raise this question; those who have been participating for a long time have not only resolved this for themselves, but have seen noobs go through the questioning process numerous times.

[MacShreach]

I'm just so much into gorgeous women I'll overlook a few details! LOL.....

Seriously the range of "why guys like t-girls" is just amazing. Personally I like the transformation....somewhere I called it "theatre of eroticism"....when someone transforms like that and becomes a beautiful woman, that act in itself is very, very attractive, and it's something a lot of men respond to, even though many won't admit it. Steinbeck wrote a really funny scene in the preface to "Log from the Sea of Cortez" where he and Ed Ricketts are discussing women in a bar and they decide that they don't like women with thin lips..."Because if there is no fullness there, where can there be fullness?" but a few beers later they decide that it will be okay if the girl makes up to make her lips appear more full, because the "intention of fullness is there." I think that if we were to give those guys a couple more beers, they'd be into t-girls too! LOL.

(A bit later on in that book, the guys are discussing aphrodisiacs when a girl of their acquaint happens to drop into the bar and they ask her what the best aphrodisiac is, and she replies "Sex," to which our men can only nod and agree. Very, very funny.)

A lot-- well all of the ones I've met except a couple of post-op girls that were in stealth-- of t-girls run their femininity reactors on 110% all the time....It's hard not to be attracted, if you like women. And I do.

There definitely are guys who like t-girls who are closet gays who want to be fucked but don't want a tattood biker on the end of the cock. That's their thing. There's no need to think you're one of them just because you like t-girls. There are also open, honest men who recognise that they are bi and are into t-girls. It's a position that has moral integrity. And you can be str8 with a twist, like me. And there are loads of shades of grey in between.

I personally don't have too much time for guys who pretend to be 100% str8 right down the middle and still they're into t-girls. I can't really believe they're being honest. Such a thing may exist but I can't say I've come across it. They always fall into one of the other categories in the end.

[Juliana_Dominguez]

ok, i've been with men! and all of them are straight!

[BOATER]

Edooo is right, your question is common and most of us have gone through that stage on questioning.
You are not gay. Gay men like men.
Whether you are a bottom, top or switch, if you are doing it with a TS that does not make you gay. You are attracted to the beauty.
Just look at that pic of Juliana Dom licking her lips as she holds the madonna CD. That's hot, and if it causes a rise in your pants like it does mine you are not gay. A gay man would not find that appealing.
Good luck, you'll be okay.

[River]

I'm not gay, but my boyfriend is.

[peaceandsex]

I have very much the same thoughts as you - I'm attracted to TS's but not to men. And I think that is a sensual issue. I love the femininity of the female body, but I like the sexual prowess of the penis. I want to explore it's power, but not with a man - because I'm not attarcted to anything else about a man. But a woman with a penis offers a great balance. Soft, sensual, feminine aspect and the penis as a strong sexual tool.

I would say it's fair to call us atleast bi curious, we all have a curiousity with the penis. We're just very picky, lol.

I hope that helps a little.

[AugenGn.]

...Being intrested in TG women is not the norm, so when you find out you like them your not sure what it is...

LV....this is my take. i'm totally into femininity and most TG women i've encountered relish and nurture their feminity in a way far fewer GG women do.

plus, there's an honesty about a TG woman as a lover. you KNOW when she's aroused. you know when she's had an orgasm. while there's no guarantee that you are the focal point of that initial arousal. you are an active participant in the orgasm. there's a certain satsifaction in that. with a GG, there's all to often an element of doubt....the suspicion of a performance masking an agenda :twisted:

[MacShreach]

ok, i've been with men! and all of them are straight!

Really really straight? I ask because I consider myself straight but a few years ago a friend, who is TS, and I had a long chat about this, and she basically left me believing that really "straight" men would run a mile as soon as the girl's penis came into the equation, and just the fact that I would have happily gone to bed with her (I haven't with that girl, she's a friend) didn't mean I was gay but I wasn't just as totally str8 as pie all the same, if you get my meaning.

I mean I know I'm not gay, because I'm not at all attracted to masculinity, men or their organs (and I wish certain men round here would be a bit more discreet with their avatars!) Maybe I'm just relaxed. I suppose it depends on your definition of str8. I know str8 guys who definitely believe that just talking to a transsexual makes you queer, and I would not want to be one of those anyway.

Anyway, whatever I am I think you're lovely. Can I ask you a really dumb techie question now? How do you get the correct punctuation marks when you type Spanish? You're the only person I know that does it properly.

[edooo]

"Maybe we should just sit back and watch the newbies talk their way through this.... "

Why are we "newbies".....what make us newbies and you "pro" ?

Newbie = fewer than a couple of dozen posts. :roll: On a forum like this, it's generally noobs who have just started posting who raise this question; those who have been participating for a long time have not only resolved this for themselves, but have seen noobs go through the questioning process numerous times.

Cmon dude, this aint the only forum of this kind, just because we havent posted much here dont make us noobs, not that i much care of what you think, its just that i think it was kinda stupid comment and and attempt to be funny.. :twisted:

[Ecstatic]

edooo, no offense was intended. I've been participating in forums "of this kind" for years, and have watched this question come up constantly, and almost always posed by guys who have only recently discovered their attraction to ts women and are--quite naturally and rightly, mind you--questioning their sexuality. If you've been participating in forums "of this kind" for a long time, you know what I'm saying. If I were just trying to be snarky, I wouldn't have gone on to comment about the uselessness of labels. My main point is that you should simply discover who you are and what you like and not worry about the labels that others might want to apply.

[BOATER]

ok, i've been with men! and all of them are straight!

Really really straight? I ask because I consider myself straight but a few years ago a friend, who is TS, and I had a long chat about this, and she basically left me believing that really "straight" men would run a mile as soon as the girl's penis came into the equation, and just the fact that I would have happily gone to bed with her (I haven't with that girl, she's a friend) didn't mean I was gay but I wasn't just as totally str8 as pie all the same, if you get my meaning.

I mean I know I'm not gay, because I'm not at all attracted to masculinity, men or their organs (and I wish certain men round here would be a bit more discreet with their avatars!) Maybe I'm just relaxed. I suppose it depends on your definition of str8. I know str8 guys who definitely believe that just talking to a transsexual makes you queer, and I would not want to be one of those anyway.

Anyway, whatever I am I think you're lovely. Can I ask you a really dumb techie question now? How do you get the correct punctuation marks when you type Spanish? You're the only person I know that does it properly.

Mac, you bring up a good point. There was a time I felt that way. But I do consider myself straight.
I knew a few TS's for years before I did anything with them. The thought of a penis on them made me sick. And one bizzarre night with some drinking I did try And It was all good till she pulled off her panties and I literally got sick. Almost threw up. We stopped there. She was cool and understanding.
I am not attracted to all TS nor am I attracted to all GG's. I am attracted to fem, pretty, smart, curvy, with nice ass and legs. What I like in a GG I like in a TS. I'm def not into the penis. But I have grown to look at the fem beauty stick differently, in an appealing way. To me it serves a different purpose. I'm not taking it up all of my holes. But I have learned to enjoy playing with it during sex, especially to see it give the girl more pleasure as she climaxs with my dick in her. To me my dick is not pretty. I love my man down there, he's lead me into so sweet spots. But a dick on a gorgeous TS is pretty, with all her curves and womenly body.
Saying a real straight guy would run away from a penis. You are right, that is what we have been programed in our minds that we are supposed to do. And I did run away litterally at one time. But give it time and I would say 90% of them would get hard seeing some TS. And would really do something with them. It's like guys saying "I wouldn't fuck a fat chick", and secretly at the end of the night they take that fat chick home. And love every minute of it bouncing her big tit and ass all over the place. My friend just married a, what he use to consider a "fat girl". And there was a time he would stay away from them. They hooked up and 2 years later they are married. But she isn't considered fat to him anymore. He calls her "think and juicey".

edooo, no offense was intended. I've been participating in forums "of this kind" for years, and have watched this question come up constantly, and almost always posed by guys who have only recently discovered their attraction to ts women and are--quite naturally and rightly, mind you--questioning their sexuality. If you've been participating in forums "of this kind" for a long time, you know what I'm saying. If I were just trying to be snarky, I wouldn't have gone on to comment about the uselessness of labels. My main point is that you should simply discover who you are and what you like and not worry about the labels that others might want to apply.

none taken, i might have reacted a bit strong, but i just didnt like you making the judgement just because i havent made many posts here! :lol: Peace! 8)

[Lehighvalley1981]

Thanx for the replies, Just wandering, alot of guys talk of T-girl freinds and being with TS women, but how do all these people find TS women, its not like you can just walk around and find one

It always shocks me, I was on another board and one guy was talking about a party he had and there where 6 or 7 Tgirls there, I figure he lives in a big city, but TG must be everywhere.

So whats the best approach to finding a nice TS women?

[MacShreach]

ok, i've been with men! and all of them are straight!

Really really straight? I ask because I consider myself straight but a few years ago a friend, who is TS, and I had a long chat about this, and she basically left me believing that really "straight" men would run a mile as soon as the girl's penis came into the equation, and just the fact that I would have happily gone to bed with her (I haven't with that girl, she's a friend) didn't mean I was gay but I wasn't just as totally str8 as pie all the same, if you get my meaning.

I mean I know I'm not gay, because I'm not at all attracted to masculinity, men or their organs (and I wish certain men round here would be a bit more discreet with their avatars!) Maybe I'm just relaxed. I suppose it depends on your definition of str8. I know str8 guys who definitely believe that just talking to a transsexual makes you queer, and I would not want to be one of those anyway.

Anyway, whatever I am I think you're lovely. Can I ask you a really dumb techie question now? How do you get the correct punctuation marks when you type Spanish? You're the only person I know that does it properly.

Mac, you bring up a good point. There was a time I felt that way. But I do consider myself straight.
I knew a few TS's for years before I did anything with them. The thought of a penis on them made me sick. And one bizzarre night with some drinking I did try And It was all good till she pulled off her panties and I literally got sick. Almost threw up. We stopped there. She was cool and understanding.
I am not attracted to all TS nor am I attracted to all GG's. I am attracted to fem, pretty, smart, curvy, with nice ass and legs. What I like in a GG I like in a TS. I'm def not into the penis. But I have grown to look at the fem beauty stick differently, in an appealing way. To me it serves a different purpose. I'm not taking it up all of my holes. But I have learned to enjoy playing with it during sex, especially to see it give the girl more pleasure as she climaxs with my dick in her. To me my dick is not pretty. I love my man down there, he's lead me into so sweet spots. But a dick on a gorgeous TS is pretty, with all her curves and womenly body.
Saying a real straight guy would run away from a penis. You are right, that is what we have been programed in our minds that we are supposed to do. And I did run away litterally at one time. But give it time and I would say 90% of them would get hard seeing some TS. And would really do something with them. It's like guys saying "I wouldn't fuck a fat chick", and secretly at the end of the night they take that fat chick home. And love every minute of it bouncing her big tit and ass all over the place. My friend just married a, what he use to consider a "fat girl". And there was a time he would stay away from them. They hooked up and 2 years later they are married. But she isn't considered fat to him anymore. He calls her "think and juicey".

Boater I basically agree with you. I consider myself straight and I have no problems with my own sexuality. The fact that I am attracted to some, and like you it's not all, TS women, is neither here nor there. They're being ultra feminine and have achieved a level of attractiveness that appeals to me. And I can see you see it the same way.

Unfortunately a lot of guys don't, and some of them tear up pretty nasty with TS girls if they think they've been conned. Those are the guys that consider themselves "super-straight" that I wouldn't want to be associated with. I think they suffer from a deep insecurity about their own sexuality, which is what makes them hang onto that label at all costs. However they pretty much describe the mainstream point of view, sad though that is. Irrespective of how I see myself, it's certain that these men would not see my interest in TS as "str8" by their definition of it. So I call myself str8 with a twist and that settles the hash. I can live with that.

This issue is actually really interesting and varies with culture. For example, there are US based people on this list who state that they can be "bottom" with a TS and still be straight. Trust me, in many cultures that just is not the case. In Brazil, for example, you stop being straight the instant you get penetrated, and you become a viado. The same is true in many other cultures. And many TS girls with a US base clearly state that they don't want a man who "bottoms."

I usually agree with Ec but in this case I don't. I'm no rookie and I have noted that whenever someone asks the question that started this thread they are usually treated in a somewhat patronising manner, patted on the head and told that once they're past being "noobs" then this will become unimportant. And I have also noted that often the most voluble scoffers are men whom I have already figured or know to be gay but refuse to accept it. (Ec is bi and open about it, a man of integrity, and I'm not referring to him here.)

FWIW I totally agree-- there is no thrill like seeing a pretty t-girl cum with your dick in her. That is addictive. I always really, really liked giving anal sex with women who enjoy it and to have that as well is just, well, amazing.

Anyway, it will be discussed again....and again.......

although hetero guys may find tgirls attractive only the ones who really do look like attractive females ones they find out err shes got a cock,or had a cock she will be knocked back no chance..

[MacShreach]

although hetero guys may find tgirls attractive only the ones who really do look like attractive females ones they find out err shes got a cock,or had a cock she will be knocked back no chance..

Yeah I know what you mean.......I had the pleasure of shocking an old friend not long ago when he saw some film of Dana International, and I wound him up by saying, "You know, she's cute," and he was very keen, she obviously turned him on.....His face was just a peach when I told him....Shouldn't do things like that I know.

It's kinda OT but I can't get my head round that at all and his reaction made me wonder......I mean, she's post-op. There's no dick. She is drop-dead. Really, she is. So what was the issue? Well it was the historical presence of the dick. So my friend--and he's a really nice guy who's not homophobic or hates gays, he's just very str8--was fucked up by something that once had been but was no more. He kept saying things like, "But underneath that's a man, with male chromosomes" and (I have to confess the whisky was oiling the chat so go easy if I get confused here) things like that, and I brought up Klinefelters-- which he'd never heard of.

In the end as always we didn't get anywhere, he's freaked out by the whole issue and I think his pov is incomprehensible. (Our relationship is of the curmudgeonly order but we are good friends.) But the fact is that the mainstream str8 pov is exactly his--even post-ops are off limits.

Now lookee here. I was just going over the archives this morning and I found this little gem, posted by "Guest" in September.


"well then stop calling youre selves str8 then since when did a str8 hetero man ever wanted to switch and take the womans position? a hetero man is all about masculinity theyre designed to be tops make babies lol put inside a hole they dont have those erogenous zone that you bi guys crave to be pumped they have prostate fair enough,but they dont have those desire to be pumped like you...its ur femmenine side that makes you want to bottom get it right,do you know why i know cause we tgirls like to be bottom,being a bottom is our way of feeling like a woman during intercourse with the opposite sex lol..get it right plzzzz"

It's so interesting. For my friend, and most mainstream pov, sexuality is determined by your birth sex. So it's not str8 for a man to want to have sex with a TS, even if she has had SRS. But for "Guest", and a lot of other TS women, sexuality is defined by the role you play in sex--str8 men fuck, women and gay men get fucked.

What that means is that sex has an actual power of transformation. If I'm reading "Guest" right, and it fits with a stack of conversations I've had over the years and with other research, then the act of being penetrated sexually is an intrinsic part of the TS transformation itself. It's like the animating spirit that breathes life into the nascent woman.


Where does this lead us? Well, I have to say it just reinforces my long-held belief that within one context, a man can be str8 and have sex with a t-girl, but that depends strictly on the roles being played. While in a long-term loving relationship people need to have room for each others sexual needs, otherwise the relationship will fail, any man that goes out seeking a t-girl to penetrate him is indulging in a gay act. That's fine or it would be if they were being honest about it, but unfortunately there are a good few guys out there who want to be fucked and who are manifestly gay, but who refuse to accept their homosexuality and use t-girls as a way of reinforcing that denial. That's a pretty cheap way to treat a woman, if you ask me.

Anyway the point of all this is that whenever someone asks "Am I gay to be interested in t-girls," they get put off, gently or roughly, sometimes by t-girls, but often by men who are gays who just don't want to discuss this issue for fear of confronting their own homosexuality.

[quirkymuse]

call me gay (figuratively) but i feel being gay or straight is about love

i've never really been in love with a man...i have been fucked, and been fucked..sucked (alot) and been sucked..but never did i want to date and cuddle


here is the question...when you see yourself at your lowest, lonliest point, and see someone saving you, someone you LOVE..is that a person a man or a woman...and thats how to know whether you are gay or bi

[bolton113]

Hey Juliana,
I am feeling confused about my sexual identity. Could you please stop bye and help? (bye the way, I love your posts!)
lol
Steve











ok, i've been with men! and all of them are straight!

[flombago]

The true TGirls are women at heart, and that's a positive thing for those of us who are not attracted to men. Many of them try harder than GGirls to be feminine and to please their partner, and they seem to know more what a guy likes sexually. As AugenGn said, there's a certain honesty to the sexual response. I think many of them seem to get more excited than GGirls. I used to avoid TGirls, but once one "tricked" me to taking it to a certain level and I realized she was thoroughly excited and her orgasm was not faked, I got "hooked" (the quoted words can give some idea of what kind of relationship it was !).

As far as being labelled "gay" or not, its pretty clear that if the general public (at least in the USA) knew a guy likes TGirls, that man would be labelled "gay" regardless of how he feels about men. I don't think there is anything wrong with that, but unfortunately there's still a lot of education and convincing required to make others, especially religious conservatives, agree that there is nothing wrong, abnormal, or "sinful" about it.

[Juliana_Dominguez]

the men i have been with are into ggs and then suddenly felt an instant attraction with ts, not just superficial but there's an attraction deep within something that's beyond the skin... and i like that, they weren't just curious, they were really in love... and then right after our relationship, break-up and all, i would just know that after 8 months she's been out dating, ggs... not with ts, nor gay men but he's back dating ggs, (they actually)...

[Juliana_Dominguez]

what i can really say about this is that, one doesn't become gay if he gets attracted to TS... like for example, if a man treats the TS as a complete girl, almost equal to how he treats a real girl, then the guy is still straight... he sees and loves the feminine side of the tranny, not really the masculine side... there is also a case with my friend wherein the guy is so completely straight that he doesn't bother about the penis of the TS... of course he sees it but he doesn't do anything to it... it also the choice of the TS in her part not to reciprocate the physical actions the guy does, like butt fucking perhaps... it becomes a one way sex indeed but simply represents the straightness of the guy... the same way, that guy at this time went back to his own likeness, dating and having sex with girls... it doesnt really matter what people say about you, as long as you believe that "this is" your sexuality, in this case being straight, then believe in yourself that you are... no one can take that right away from you... it's your own sexuality we are talking about right...

[MacShreach]

what i can really say about this is that, one doesn't become gay if he gets attracted to TS... like for example, if a man treats the TS as a complete girl, almost equal to how he treats a real girl, then the guy is still straight... he sees and loves the feminine side of the tranny, not really the masculine side... there is also a case with my friend wherein the guy is so completely straight that he doesn't bother about the penis of the TS... of course he sees it but he doesn't do anything to it... it also the choice of the TS in her part not to reciprocate the physical actions the guy does, like butt fucking perhaps... it becomes a one way sex indeed but simply represents the straightness of the guy... the same way, that guy at this time went back to his own likeness, dating and having sex with girls... it doesnt really matter what people say about you, as long as you believe that "this is" your sexuality, in this case being straight, then believe in yourself that you are... no one can take that right away from you... it's your own sexuality we are talking about right...

Great post Juliana.

[Juliana_Dominguez]

what i can really say about this is that, one doesn't become gay if he gets attracted to TS... like for example, if a man treats the TS as a complete girl, almost equal to how he treats a real girl, then the guy is still straight... he sees and loves the feminine side of the tranny, not really the masculine side... there is also a case with my friend wherein the guy is so completely straight that he doesn't bother about the penis of the TS... of course he sees it but he doesn't do anything to it... it also the choice of the TS in her part not to reciprocate the physical actions the guy does, like butt fucking perhaps... it becomes a one way sex indeed but simply represents the straightness of the guy... the same way, that guy at this time went back to his own likeness, dating and having sex with girls... it doesnt really matter what people say about you, as long as you believe that "this is" your sexuality, in this case being straight, then believe in yourself that you are... no one can take that right away from you... it's your own sexuality we are talking about right...

Great post Juliana.

Thanks, i just want to speak my mind...

[River]

Actually I'm trisexual...I'll try anything.