Transition and the Reaction of Family Members

[TSMorena35]

I remember like it was yesterday when I marched into my mother's home and told her that I was a Transsexual and that I could no longer live as a man, my mother hardly raised and eyebrow and she simply replied that she would love me even if I had two heads.
The story would be beautiful if it ended there but, the reality is that while she has always loved me it has taken her years to deal with some of her lost dreams for me.
The dream that was the most difficult for her to let go was the dream of being a grandmother. When I was 21, and started transition my doctor advised me to get castrated immediately because I was already starting late and that the hormones would not have much effect on my body without it. Without thinking twice, I underwent the procedure and told my mother about it afterwards. Once again, like a champ my mother hardly raised an eyebrow so I figured all was cool and on the surface it was. The truth only reared it's ugly head when we would have disagreements and I would hear lines like "I know what I had and it had two bouncing balls and a swinging dick", and my all time favorite "I only get on my knees to pray" to which I replied me too, she shot me one of those looks that said liar, and so I continued "who ever told you that the only position to give fellatio was on one's knee". It took us roughly six years to get out of the phase.
When I turned 30, she called me one night complaining how all of her girl friends are now grandmothers, and how she would never be one, I'm her only child and the last living member of her immediate family, so I just listened and let her vent.
Now that I'm 35, she calls and talks about the headaches people's grandchildren are causing them, and I laugh and agree, of course knowing that she would take the headaches and all if she herself could be a grandmother.
Our relationships is not perfect, but then again is any relationship between two people with different ways of thinking ever perfect. Though when we have disagreements today, we just debate the issues at hand without discussing my being a transsexual or the state of my genitalia at birth.
Now my mother is my best friend though sometimes when she forgets I'm 35, and not 15, she works my last nerve, I wouldn't trade her for nothing in the world.
How did your family react when you told them you were going to transition? And for the men that openly date Transsexuals, how did your family react when you told them?
http://hometown.aol.com/tsmorena35/index.html

[etture]

This is from my blog check my profile but its a big issue for guys too.I learned that I will never scacrifice my happiness for what society or anybody thinks "Guys remember dating a TS is not telling everyone that she is if they ask its between you both to decide what to say.What you both do behind close doors is your thing like if you're wife strap it on to fuck you or has sex with a female friend.Its between both of a you a relationship is a two-way street but never be ashame for its not love if you are"

[Mustard_Plug]

I was 18 when i told my family that I was in a relationship with a transexual. It has never been easy since im youngest of three sons and I constantly get ribbed by my brothers and father, but I needed to do it out of piece of mind, they know of my preference and if they cant handle it oh well. As of now I havent really had any big arguements over it, mainly little comments here and there.

[Ecstatic]

Thank you for sharing your story, Morena. You show great strength of character. As a bisexual male, I've only encountered a small portion of the kind of rejection and misunderstanding that I know a transgendered person will encounter, mostly around people thinking if I'm bi I'm gay (which as you know is not the same thing; I'm bi sexually but almost exclusively attracted to women, both gg and tg). Some close friends and family members know, and they are quite comfortable with it, but others I would never tell because they are too homophobic.

I am very happily married these 24 years to a wonderful woman, so I am not in a position to date TS women, but my wife is completely supportive and understanding of my occasionally seeing TS escorts; she knows there is no threat to our relationship (in fact, we're closer than ever since I started over 3 years ago) and she says she can't see denying me that part of who I am. I am the luckiest man on earth in this regard. My wife has even met my favorite tgirl escort (a lovely Thai girl who is a very good friend) socially and they got on wonderfully.

While I've told several close friends and a couple of family members about my transsexual friends--as friends--I have not mentioned any escort relationships with them not because they won't accept the gender issue, but because they might question our marital relationship. My wife and I are in complete agreement on this: we have an open, honest marriage, but most people would have a hard time understanding or accepting it and think there's something wrong. We know there isn't, and we don't care what the world might think, but it's simply much easier to keep my occasional (5 or 6 times a year) encounters on the QT.

Anyway, I am proud to be seen in public with any of my TS friends; I've gone out to dinner, shopping, and long walks with them, no different from any other friends. No one takes notice, unless it's some guys who are envious of me for the gorgeous woman I'm with. I have several transgendered friends who I chat with online or on the phone often, about any subject of mutual interest.

OK, I'm rambling, just thought I'd share some of where I'm at. Peace out.

[MsDazzler]

I still havent told my family except for my brother who I m living with. He is cool with it, My sister suspect, but the rest of the family is in the dark. I am still part-time, so it s still easy to hide from them. But ist s getting harder and harder as I slug on towards full-time because of all the women things lying around in my room and the apartment. lol

[Jenna]

Same here.....None of my family knows except for my cousin & grandma but all my friends and acquaintances know. I am about to go full time in about a month or two.

[Scott]

I've always admired the fact that you ladies are willing to take the steps in your life to be the person you always knew you should be. (Did that make sense? lol).
Even if everyone doesn't know or accept there's always going to be someone out there that will always suport you and give the strength needed. As long as you got that person (or persons) you can conquer the world.

Scott

[GeorgiaTgal]

Hello everyone. Well, I was 22 when I realized that I was different and started dressing. Not long after that, I found out that I was gender dysphoric. So, I decided that I needed to change my life and the transition begun. I did go to me mum and told her that I was going to live my life as a woman and that it was not a phase. I do not think she suspected, but it I did not think that she would have being that I did not spend much time with her as a teen. She acted like it was no big deal then, but later, I got the assault and understanding that she was confused about the whole thing. So, for a while, we did not talk and I gave her time to think about it. As for my brother and sisters, it definitely was not a big deal for them. I am the eldest of four, so I guess they thought it was my life and decision anyway. I explained to them that I was born different and that it was important to me to change my outside to match my insides. Luckily, I transitioned after I got out of school, because I was somewhat popular and various people would ask my siblings about me. They never told anyone that I had transitioned, but just said that I was doing good. :) After a few months of not talking to my mum, she came over my house to see me and I could tell that even though she was struggling to understand what was going on with me, she still loved me. So, we talked for a bit and I gave her some of the info that I had gotten about transgenderism, transitioning, hormones, transsexuals, etc.. I really think that helped her a lot to understand that I was not 'freak', 'weirdo' or that I was just a gay man pretending to be a woman. Now, 11 years later, I am very close with my mum and my siblings. My mum and I chat like two old hens and enjoy spending time together. She knows now that I am a woman and tells her friends that I am her daughter. I know that she has had to deal with the confusion with some of her friends who knew that she had two boys and 2 girls, instead of 1 boy and 3 girls. But, she did handle it and never complained about me making her look bad or being embarassed. With my siblings, I think they admire me for going through the transition and I do talk to them about some of the things I deal with. I am an auntie and my nieces and newphews do not know about the transition I went through and most likely never will. My siblings will not tell them because it is private and really not relevant. And I do not think I need to tell them, because they know and love me as their 'fun auntie'! :) As for the rest of my extended family of aunts, uncles, cousins and great cousins, they all know and do accept me. But, at family gatherings, I cannot help but feel like a side show 'freak' as they all come over and 'gaze' at me... Some of them do not remember me as it has been so long and it gets difficult to explain that I was once a boy and now I am a woman. Some of the older folk definitely do not get it!... Anyway, I am rambling here. My point is that it is tough for all of us, but just on different levels. I know that some has it a lot worse because they get disowed and put down by their famililes and I am so sorry for that. I was quite blessed with a good family and I am very thankful that I have them. I get lots of support from my mum and siblings, and that is what truly matters. :D

[DessiLu]

I didn't have to tell anyone lol my family could already tell I was going to be different. Everyone in my family accepts me except for one person and that is my uncle but he's just a drunk so I don't really care what he thinks :)

[Jordan]

i guess that I am lucky in regards, that i have an amazingly supportive family that shows nothing but unconditional love towards me, Even my father (before his untimely passing) a stoic ex career Military officer accepted me, so in all i feel blessed to have the support system of my Family and of course my great friends.

[Scott]

i guess that I am lucky in regards, that i have an amazingly supportive family that shows nothing but unconditional love towards me, Even my father (before his untimely passing) a stoic ex career Military officer accepted me, so in all i feel blessed to have the support system of my Family and of course my great friends.

Just for the fact I met your family I would say that you are truly blessed with a great supportive family. Everyone should be as lucky to have that.

Scott