Hormones, Therapy, and the No-Ops - Curious

[roseofsapphire]

I've considered going No-Op on a few occasions and on others getting the full SRS.

What I am wondering is how are you able to get support from Endos and Therapists to be on hormones when you are planning to be No-Op, or is this not an issue for them?

I'm coming from an online community that is very SRS goal oriented and thought this was the only way unless you wanted to use hormones Do It Yourself.

[Jordan]

Hey sweetie, i think most of us plan on going post op in the beginning, but as the journey goes on, then the choices are presented and i think it's what you want to do, I am Non-Op (by choice) and on hormones, so i really think it's up to the individual, and a REALLY good Endo or DR, wouldn't question you..

[Arianna]

I've considered going No-Op on a few occasions and on others getting the full SRS.

What I am wondering is how are you able to get support from Endos and Therapists to be on hormones when you are planning to be No-Op, or is this not an issue for them?

I'm coming from an online community that is very SRS goal oriented and thought this was the only way unless you wanted to use hormones Do It Yourself.
I was warned by a pre-op friend to not discuss that I had no plans for SRS, or they might be reluctant to help me. She also told me to lie, and say that I didn't smoke cigarettes, or they would give me crap about it. But I found a clinic that is very thorough, professional, and realistic. They realize that the dangers of self-medicating outweigh those issues. So far, I have nothing but good things to say about the Callen-Lorde clinic. I feel lucky that they're as close to where I live as they are. It amazes me that in the Philippines, doctors can't legally prescribe 'mones but the culture is generally more accepting of TG women. There are ALOT of ts girls there but, sadly, many of them are using birth control meds for hrt.

[roseofsapphire]

Where is that clinic?

[Arianna]

Where is that clinic? It's in Manhatten. http://www.callen-lorde.org/services/trans.html

[Arianna]

Where is that clinic?

I know that's not close, but here's the Wisconson section of the TG Guide. Hope that helps.
http://www.tgguide.com/Guide/wisconsin.htm

[Angela_Deren]

Semi-related...

After a month of searching, I finally found myself a therapist :) Can't wait to go in this week and feel her out (she has 3 other TS clients at different stages, so she should be good). I'm going in with the attitude that I should be completly honest about certain things such as self-medicating but also fear that this could cause her to not support me and therefore not recommend me to an endo. Really curious what that first session is going to be like. I know that after I've told her where I am at now in life, that my first goal is to try to talk to family better about it (mom knows, but isn't on board for support). It feels good to finally be making this step though :)

[Arianna]

Semi-related...

After a month of searching, I finally found myself a therapist :) Can't wait to go in this week and feel her out (she has 3 other TS clients at different stages, so she should be good). I'm going in with the attitude that I should be completly honest about certain things such as self-medicating but also fear that this could cause her to not support me and therefore not recommend me to an endo. Really curious what that first session is going to be like. I know that after I've told her where I am at now in life, that my first goal is to try to talk to family better about it (mom knows, but isn't on board for support). It feels good to finally be making this step though :) My doctor actually asked me how long I had been self-medicating when he met me. I smiled and said, "I haven't taken anything yet. That's why I came to see you." So my guess is that he would've been cool about it, either way. That's why I think that the doctor can make a big difference. If they're going to moralize, you're not dealing with someone who's being realistic about it. They should understand that you can either do it w/ or without them, but that you're there because you'd prefer to have a professional give you the proper guidance.

Good luck w/ the therapist. That can also be a big factor.

[maggiegee]

Semi-related...

After a month of searching, I finally found myself a therapist :) Can't wait to go in this week and feel her out (she has 3 other TS clients at different stages, so she should be good). I'm going in with the attitude that I should be completly honest about certain things such as self-medicating but also fear that this could cause her to not support me and therefore not recommend me to an endo. Really curious what that first session is going to be like. I know that after I've told her where I am at now in life, that my first goal is to try to talk to family better about it (mom knows, but isn't on board for support). It feels good to finally be making this step though :) My doctor actually asked me how long I had been self-medicating when he met me. I smiled and said, "I haven't taken anything yet. That's why I came to see you." So my guess is that he would've been cool about it, either way. That's why I think that the doctor can make a big difference. If they're going to moralize, you're not dealing with someone who's being realistic about it. They should understand that you can either do it w/ or without them, but that you're there because you'd prefer to have a professional give you the proper guidance.

Good luck w/ the therapist. That can also be a big factor.

I totally agree.

Nowadays there are many ways to accomplish HRT. You can purchase
hormones on the Internet, get them from other countries, from your
friends, some girls will even use birth control pills as has been stated.

However, estrogen is a powerful drug that will have profound physical,
and psychological effects.

Ideally a transwoman should be being monitored to make sure that she
is not experiencing any adverse reactions, such as liver damage, or
emotional issues.

Also she needs to be monitored to be sure that she is getting the proper
dosage for her, so that she is able to obtain her desired results.

[LeoraMoore]

...

[BrendaQG]

I'm coming from an online community that is very SRS goal oriented and thought this was the only way unless you wanted to use hormones Do It Yourself.

People like that are almost always disappointed. Having a hole instead of a pole does not a female make. SRS is not the goal living a womans life is and one does not need a vagina to do that. Ask any female who is intersexed.

Legal and monetary conditions have lead me to be non-op, really. I want surgery in Thailand which will cost more than I have. Then this stupid state I live in has made a law that only recognizes surgery done in the USA. US doctors just don't know what a girl like me wants (realistic results useful for sex with a man.) I also fear being butchered.

My advice would be to humor them. Tell the doctors that you have plans for SRS but some other conditions have not been meet. For example you cannot afford SRS with the doctor you want. "if only I had more money doc! :-(" :-? It is nice if the doctor is cool and realizes that weather or when to have SRS is a personal choice. Just don't depend on that.

[Viridian]

Ever wonder WHY doctors are so stringent in ensuring that a person's "ready" for SRS? Why doctors make people wait SO very long before granting approval for the surgery?

It's precisely because they know people are lying to them and telling the docs exactly what they want to hear. The process takes a long time because if you're nuts and impatient, then you won't want to go the distance. It's to weed out the fetishists and such.

You (the general you) may think you know exactly what you want. Let me frickin' well guarantee you, you don't. Most if not all people are pathetic when it comes to knowing their own state of mind, motivations and such. Can you accurately and objectively state your strengths and weaknesses, explain with a good degree of accuracy where certain personality quirks came from? Probably not.

Try telling a doctor you don't smoke so you'll be more likely to get hormones. Yellow fingers? Check. Pack of cigarettes exposed in the purse? Check. Smell of cigarette smoke whiffing off you? Check. Doctors aren't stupid, people. Ever gone to medical school? It's a LOT of work. These people are trained to notice things that most people fluff over. It's their job and they tend to be good at it.

You want good advice? Be honest. That way the doctor(s) can be honest with you. You think you're smarter than your doctor? Sure, self-medicate. Natural selection at work. Be sure to tell the ER people what to do about the blood clot that you throw, you know - since you're so much smarter than everyone.

[Viridian]

...how are you able to get support from endos and therapists to be on hormones when you are planning to be No-Op, or is this not an issue for them?

It really depends on the person and on the doctors involved. In my case, I wrote a letter to my family doctor stating in plain language what I was going through and what I needed from him - a referral to a specialist.

When I got my referral, I went in, talked to the specialist for half an hour in a very clear, concise and honest manner. I indicated that I had no plans for SRS, that I'd done my research, and that I felt I was ready to proceed to the next stage in my personal evolution, if you will. He asked about a few things - to be honest, I really don't remember much of the conversation.

I couldn't read the damn thing, but the pharmacist filled the prescription that day. No therapist, no waiting period. I've been on hormones ever since, and I have no plans or desire for the big chop-chop.

As a related matter, I got a referral for a therapist specialising in TG matters last year. It sort of came as a surprise to me, but it happened while I was in the hospital. Anyways, she seemed surprised when I told her that I really didn't know why I was there to see her. She explained that she had a long waiting list, that people were doing whatever they could to get in to see her. I told her I didn't really think I needed a therapist, we chatted some more and she agreed.

Maybe Canada's different, I don't know. Everyone I've ever heard of having problems with endocrinologists or therapists has been American, so maybe you guys have shitty doctors for this sort of thing.

P.S. Happily non-op, btw :D

[Viridian]

Having a hole instead of a pole does not a female make. SRS is not the goal, living a womans life is; one does not need a vagina to do that. Ask any female who is intersexed.

Very true and very insightful.

Think about this, people. One day you're out there, pre-op, tucking away merrily, nobody sees your goodies. Life as normal.

You get SRS, wahoo. After you can walk normally again, you go out for the first time, post-surgery. Nobody sees your goodies.

Did you change any in the eyes of the world? Nope. You're the same now as you were before. Well, unless you have on your "I went to Thailand and all I got was this VAGINA!" t-shirt. Then you might get a few people to notice, maybe.

The world at large doesn't know you had SRS, probably never will. Genitals matter to a very few people: your doctor(s), potential lovers and people in gym showers, basically. Why obsess so very much over them? Nobody else does.

"Oh but I have to have SRS to be complete!" some among us may moan. "My life just can't begin unless I'm a REAL woman."

Bad news. Just because you got SRS doesn't make you a woman, any more than giving SRS to Earl the 300-pound trucker makes HIM a woman. Womanhood, femininity - call it what you want - is a very complex thing made up of physical, biological, social, intellectual, and emotional factors. It's NOT just "Oh I was meant to be a woman, I know that" and some pills.

Hell, my mother's accused me of not being feminine because I don't cut sandwiches diagonally. Go figure.

[Wondergirl]

I've always been honest to my doctor about how far I would want to go. I just told him I am taking this one day at a time and is not even thinking about SRS. SRS is not something that I want to do too late because I think if I were to have a big operation, I should get it done when I am young but I still have alot of years left before I am no longer considered as "young". I would imagine doing it in my late 20s.

[Sonia]

Much love and respect to you girls. I have had surgery and it was a great experience. The pressure in being a TS is great. Passing,hormones,surgery and desires of every girl on this thread.

I now enjoy my life and I am thankful for my blessings and I no longer waste my time worrying how the world views transexuals. Now, I'm all about enjoying being the woman I am blessed to be without all the Unnecessary worries about being transgendered.

To all the girls on this board, You are all Women to me. I don't care if your running out of mones or have had surgery or worry if your passable every second of the day. I see you ALL as Women. You just have to start seeing that within yourself.

Stop the worrying and Start Enjoying your life as a woman.